My travelling frequented in trains after getting posted to Bangalore. Believe me on this, stories like jab-we-met do happen here and there but on a serious note, the intensity gets dissipated once the journey ends. I think everyone who is very familiar with train journeys would have encountered hijras/transgender many times. I encountered them first time when i was a kid of 10, by then i had no idea of what they are! They seemed more feminine to me and sometimes manly unexpectedly, hence i was so confused to decide more about their gender than to enquire about their status/nature in society.
In trains, on streets, in many galli-mohalla's they make unusual noises by clapping their hands in such a way which sounds more like cursing the one they are facing rather than letting know their presence right there. Unless you give them money they expect, they don’t move from their position and sometimes one’s stubborn decision invites the embarrassing presentation of their acts. They touch the cheeks, use a filthy language, partly undress themselves or sit next to you or on your laps.
Most of the times i lacked the maturity to understand their behaviour, their needs and their nature. One day i encountered them asking money to a girl, who literally behaved as if some dangerous animals have catch her. Partly i agree that she was scared but to put it straight forward what was it so embarrassing to give such a response to them? They never hurt anybody unless you invite them to do so.
One day i was on the way back to Bangalore from Hyderabad in train, alone reading “Kite Runner”, sitting next to window with no companions. One of them came and approached me when i was completely engrossed in the novel. I usually give them 5 Rs, but that day i had no change and conveyed the same to him politely. He said, he will give me change back and when i gave him 10, he gave me 5 back, to be honest. While leaving he waved his hands on head and left saying "bhagwan tera bhala karega beta...". Later i realized that it wasn’t money that made him say so, which they usually get it easily from anyone; it was the genuineness, or say act of normal behavior towards him that impressed him that time.
Their acts seem much uncultured, embarrassing and sometimes disgusting but the more i encountered them, the more deeply I thought of the issue with understanding. Just because they beg for money or force you to contribute, they are not beggars or gundas. It has become their only profession, in which they get what’s needed for their daily living because they are neither recognized for what they are nor employed by anyone, in society. I do not say, invite them home and provide roti-chawal.The point is , unless they are given their rights, how do you expect them to quiet from what they do for living? I know..i know it feels embarrassing even to talk/chat with them because they don’t seem "OK" in society( sadly even to me sometimes L) but the whole idea boils down to humanity.
It’s pretty simple, if they are given recognition for what they are (in tamil nadu they are been recognized as "third-sex"), respect for their gender, jobs they can work on, i think the differences can be reduced. I know the risk of its changing equations of society is what worrying you, but what are you saving for? When someone had been condemned from living till date.
They live far from the places which you call “normal”, they cannot work there where you think “normal” people work, they cannot ask for anything as we think everything expect them is “normal”. Now after writing all this, I am skeptical about the meaning of normal itself.
Image Courtesy : GoogleP.S: Seems like i am dedicating this month for underprivileged people living in the society :). i would be glad if you drop your thoughts,to let me know your concerns about them. :)
52 comments:
nice post about the TS, i guess chennai's decision to give them third sex was commendable.
i had some fucking funny experiences, specially when ur with girls ;)
amit
Your posts really are very compassionate. Infact I agree with everything you have said. I myself can emember an experience similar to yours. I gave him a 20 rs note and he gave me 10 rs back and blessing thrown in for free.
mahesh, third sex, thats an interesting points.. detailed comments later, got to prepare for the exams...
The biggest issue is there are miscreants who are using this creative idea to dress like a transgender and beg for money and use this proven formula as many fear transgenders.There is no way to distinguish such people.
Yes, Transgenders suffer because of being considered taboo in the society.Its takes a small % of people willing to create opportunities and employ them for a cause and integrate them into the mainstream.
Great post...
Writing for a good cause... Nice. We hardly look at the cruelties of nature. You wrote it very beautifully, it would surely grab the readers attention inside.
that was nice of u 2 mention them in ur post...it shud surely help change thots of few ppl atleast...
Nice Article Mahesh...i m cutting my comment short coz ur article reminded me of my encounter with the "hijras" and now i ll be posting it as my next post..thanx for reminding me bro
:)...
Btw i think they deserve a solid place in society...to discriminate against some1 just coz they are diffenrt physically is not right..
cheers
amith
well...again u picked up a sensitive issue...about which we Even detest to talks. Kudos to that!
BTW, society is acknowledging it sooner than later. They have been an inherent part of society since ages...joining us in celebration. New Born kids, marriage, or even couples in garden. They do fleece, harass in a way, when they refuse to nudge if one doesn't give them money. Well, I have had bad experinces with them. I don't abhor them, though!
Bihar Govt has opened up vacancies, where the third sex is to be recruited!
Congratulation Mahesh. Very thoughtful write up. I appreciate this writing.
I have thought about these people a lot of time. I never had any problem with them. whenever they ask for money, I just give them 5 Rs. and they also go away without a word. But I had seen them shouting if someone doesn't give any money to them or tease them.
Society should start changing their perception about them and treat them as normal people.
In Karnataka, they are now called as "Mangala Mukhi" which means "The face which brings out good luck".
Shyam Benagals "Welcome to Sajjanpur" has portrayed them nicely.
m speechless now..:) lovely article! soooperb!esp dat kiterunner wala incident...so vividly narrated!
Amit,
Thanks amit, i hope it was fair enough to put a post on them too, when people have started talking about LGBT's.
Why dont you share your funny experiences.. :-)
Cheers
Mahesh
Piyush,
Thanks for those words.They inspire alot.
Hmmm, i think many experience it but fail to notice things.
Hope people start making difference :-)
Keep visiting :-)
Cheers
Shravan,
Thanks, would be waiting for the comments :-)
Cheers
Praveen,
Seeing you after a long long time commenting on a post.
I know that problem is there, but one cant just ignore the problems of transgenders..
Thats a great idea but donno when will our society grow up. :-)
Thanks for the comment :-)
Cheers
Shomoita,
Thanks yaar. These days i am hearign and reading alot about the racism and inequality stuff against many communities in papers and all.Hence this post resulted.
Hope it does, as i see you guys liking it. :-)
Keep visiting :-)
Cheers
Neha,
Thanks neha, yes, i hope it does.
keep visiting :-)
Cheers
Amith,
Thanks ok dude. I would be glad if you post a article on it as it will lead to awareness of it. I am happy that you thought of doing so.
Even i think that they deserve a respected place in society. Donno why physical attributes are being discriminated from so long.
Would be waiting for your post :-)
Keep visiting.
Cheers
Mahesh
Rajeev,
Well, i came across such a post, so i thought why not should i write about it.
Its ok, bad experiences teach us a lot of things in life.It would be a sign of maturity if we make use of that experience in future for making a difference.
In a lot of events, they are a part of it but when it comes to aceepting them, people back off . Which as a matter of fact,is a bad sign of inhumanity towards them.
Great to hear that bihar govt has taken such a step in favour of them.
Thanks for the comment and keep visiting :-)
Cheers
Mahesh
Sudesh,
Thanks sudesh and i am glad you liked it too.
Many of us give a thought to it dude, but the rest of us make a difference by offensing them in different ways. No matter what, as always, i try to be as generous to possible.
They dont need our pity or help. What they need is respect and place in our so called society to live a happy life.
Well, i heard it too from my mom many times.She says they are the sign of good luck and we should not disrespect them.
Hmm i watched that movie and liked the concept too.
There are many writers in this community who have written about their experiences. Though i never had a chance to read, but i heard the pain can be felt when you give a read to them.
Hope for the better of each individual who lives in society.
Thanks for your contribution.
keep visiting :-)
Cheers
Mahesh
Divsi,
Thanks punjabi kudi... :-)
Well, i cant forget that day in my life. I just felt so bad for being a part of that society which behaves in such a manner with them.
Thanks again for the say :-)
Keep visiting :-)
Cheers
Hi Mahesh,
I liked the way you had written this article. Its true I also get scared sometimes if they come very close to my vehicle when I am driving alone and usually if I am in Cab, the driver and fellow passengers would ask me to raise the window in order to avoid them. Its true that they are considered as a good luck by some people, like in my cousins marriage their parents had invited them specially to bless the newly wedded couple as it would bring good luck for them.
Sorry for not commenting on your earlier posts.
Don't use that nose (-) in the smilies, otherwise it won't be animated. You've to use the Yahoo Emoticon rules. :)
Hi Mahesh, there is love and compassion in ever human being. Sometimes the ideals that we have been brought up with block our mind in such a way that we are unable to accept something new.
Yes the third sex is as human and sensitive as we are, its their way of life and their way of making ends meet..they are right in their place and should get the same amount of respect like other people do.
A great thought provoking post!thanks for visitn my blog, do come again!
That's a commendable post, Mahesh.
I have had my own experiences with them and some of them were harrowing, like : once in hyd wen I was in the auto on my way to office, they jumped in...all 4 of them... and tried misbehaving... instead of politely asking for money, I never by rule refuse them any money... but THAT day was horrifying...
On another ocassion, in a train... I greeted a beautiful female... and later as the train moved frm the station... she turned out to be eunuch... I was SHOCKED... but still I gave her money...
I understand they suffer due to OUR prejudice.
Hi Mahesh:)
Greetings:)
You have very beautifully expressed your experience and feeling about this third gender who are called eunuchs. They are to be pitied because they have to live a life which will not not fit in a normal society. People would like to talk to strangers but they will run away from this third gender.
I remember having an encounter with them in Bhopal when my third son was born. Some how they found out about the birth of my son and they came in a gang to my house. They started singing and dancing in joy. They blessed us saying that we got a healthy normal child. They demanded Rs. 1000. We told them that we didn’t have that much money to give. Then they started telling us of the miserable life they led and insisted that we pay them Rs.1000. Finally, we agreed to pay in two installments. They agreed.
I feel sad for them. But society will not accept them. I do not understand why their parents can’t take care of them? Or why the govt. Is not running an institution to look after them? The public, social organizations and politicians should take up their case with the concerned authorities and see that justice is done.
I enjoyed reading your excellent post on these unfortunate people. The photo with eunuchs dressed in all their finery is thought provoking.
Have a nice day Mahesh:)
Joseph
Hi Mahesh,
I strongly feel that they are part of our society and should be given equal privileges. I really appreciate your gentility towards them. Wish everyone could do the same.
We need to grow as people and as a society. Soon.
Awesome post!
Hoping for things to be better in the times to come.
Cheers
Amazing Mahesh even it arises skepticism as to the definition of normal life. They deserve to be equals but that's the irony.
I am always impressed with our usage of words and expression. Hats off to you dear.
Veni,
Thanks for commenting and sharing your experiences.
I do agree with the partial reluctance to be casual ,that comes into picture.
Keep visiting.
Cheers
A New Beginning,
Thanks for those kind and true words.. Glad you liked the post.
Surely, will do so...
Keep visiting..
Cheers
Shomoita,
Hmmmm.. will do so from next post. :)
Thanks for that dear.
Cheers
Harshita,
Thanks yaar...
I agree with you. Certain incidents, certain behaviours cannot be digested. Good comes with bad right? same here too..
Few started taking advantage out of it, may be it doesnt matter to at all. Rest are suffering you see..That brings pain :(
Thanks for the kind comment.
Keep visiting.
Cheers
Joseph,
Welcome to my blog and thanks a lot for the very big comment on this post.
I completely agree with you And would say thats how the things have become.
Thanks again for the comment.
Keep visiting.
Cheers
Isha,
Hmmm....I know isha..thanks...
Cheers
Imagination,
Hey thanks, thats one of the best compliemnts i have got so far..
Keep visiting.
Cheers
Nice blog. And that's a a nice topic you've touched upon. Your writings are heartfelt.
...Well...nice Idea....But I feel, it should be less of a statement, or philosophy. We should instead, put up a simple story, narration....what say?
I didn't delete any comment!
ok!!!!!!!!!! thankoo thankoo..
my thoughts were jus wanderin sumwer n i can now shout EUREKAAAA! hehe:p
delete the comment asap[ not mine ! yours;p]!!!:)) brilliant idea..i m doin the start..will mail raj the first part ..i hav his id..[mostly shud enter his mailbox by monday]:)
n i agree wid rajeev bout the simple narration:)
p.s: did u say ure not interested in a love story??:o:O:O liarrr!!;)
@Divsi/ Mahesh
Here we go...
Divsi/Rajeev
Kool...achcha laga ki mere idea ko kisi ne crap nahi samjha :-P
Chalo apni gaadi start karde divsi...
Oye..sabhi kehte hai, isiliye maine love stories se break le liya :D
rajeev, be prepared to write the next part..
Let me know if anything by call.
P.S: Do u have my number :-P
Ofcourse...Mahesh...I have ur cell no...ur mail id...ur orkut a/c....and here is my other nos
011-43107823
9212201141
9350393263
raj@mercurysquad.com
So...now I won't loose contact with u....hehe!
Hmmmm yeah..... :-)
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